nursing at 17 months

Did I think I'd be nursing this long? -The short answer is yes, but I don't think I really thought it through completely. I always had a vague preference for "child-led weaning," but I think I was under the (mis)impression that children quite naturally stepped off from nursing gradually. For example, newborn infants nurse every 2 hours (or more), at a year maybe they are nursing every 5 hours, & at 17 months every 7 hours, etc. Nothing systematic, but I guess I thought he would gradually want to nurse less & less of his own accord.

But nothing could be further from the truth. Oh, I am sure there are kids that "self-wean" by a year, but I am certain they are rare in the very purest sense. The mother must be participating in some regard, be it by ceasing to offer or by refusing at certain times (in public, at night, etc.). Because X is most certainly not interested in weaning & would nurse every couple hours like a newborn baby if I let him. And I do, for the most part. I have made no real efforts to restrict his access.

But there are times of late when I am willing to nip the endless night-time comfort nursing in the bud. The amazing thing is that he seems to get it. For example, he will nurse to sleep for 15 minutes on one side, 15 minutes on the other & then at the end of my patience I will pop him off & say, "no more milkie, X -milkie is all gone." And he will repeat, "wowie all gone" several times, as if he's processing that information. He doesn't wail & beg for "mo wowie," but instead settles down to the sometimes endless process of settling himself (usually involves lots of tossing, turning and wall-kicking). Meanwhile, I lay there & while I am not doing my own thing I am at least not subjecting my nipples to the torment of endless friction.

And it really isn't all bad, this toddler nursing thing (nonstop comfort nursing, aside). I am grateful daily for the close connection it affords us. He is all over the place these days, investigating, exploring, talking, walking forwards & backwards & upside down. If it weren't for these cuddly, intimate moments I am not sure I would get much attention from him, aside from him asking me to draw him a car or read him a book or pick him up so he can reach the switch to turn on & off the ceiling fan. My heart melts when, in the middle of a hug or after a good long tickle, he pokes his little index finger at my collar bone & says: "wowie, mama." And while I really don't want to be one of these La Leche mamas who is tandem nursing 3 & 5 year olds, I admit I will miss him when he is gone....