Cardinal rule #1 in blogging is this: never apologize for not blogging. If you go missing for a few days, fine. But when you return don't offer excuses for your absence. Your readers just want to know what's going on with you. They don't care about how bad you feel for leaving them in the lurch. Just write something, damn it! But the truth is, I feel really bad about it. Every night I lay in bed exhausted, sore and hungry (yes, hungry because nothing tastes good!) dreaming up all the post topics I should have written these passing days but couldn't because I was too damned tired. It is the most frustrating thing imaginable (second only to the fact that my brain and entire vocabulary seem to have left the premises).
I have to say, I have never longed quite so intensely for a swift passage through time as I do these days, smack in the middle of my first trimester. I feel like I have been hanging out around week #7 for ages. Everyone tells me that things get better during the second tri, and I struggle to believe. Each day I wake up imagining that perhaps today it will be better, that my nausea will have subsided while I slept, leaving me refreshed and once again hungry for healthy things instead of graham crackers and pizza and fruit roll-ups. The other day, I dragged my growing ass to the gym to use the exercise bike (jogging is out of the question owing to the fact that my breast are like giant, aching tumors). I noted a perky young thing across the way, huffing it at high speeds on the elliptical and the girl had to have been around 7 months pregnant. I am thinking, "here I am a measly 7 weeks and I'm lucky to log 30 minutes and that girl is carrying around a bowling ball and looks to have another several miles in her!?" Maybe it does get easier and it isn't just me. I am hoping against hell that I eventually come out of this awful slump.
Also, may I bitch for a moment about all this "treasure these moments" business that I keep getting? I swear, it is only the women for whom childbearing is a distant memory (i.e. women with children who are nearly my age) who insist that pregnancy is a joy and a blessing and that I should be wallowing in each delightful and miraculous moment because "I'll only be pregnant with this child one time." And thank god for that!
Okay -so, there you have it: a little unruly scrawl. I promise to be a better blogger from now on, but please don't expect too much until after August 15 (when everything is due to turn rosy...if I can believe what I'm hearing...)
5 comments:
Yeah, that "treasure these moments" business is complete crap. If I recall, there's really only one cool thing about being pregnant; the first time you feel the baby move, that's incredible. Other than that, I think most everyone would easily volunteer to sleep for most of the 9 months, only to be awakened by a cute, healthy, and clean little infant squirmming quietly by your side.
Just so you're not completely discouraged by that, the first time you hear the heartbeat at the doctors office is also awesome, and seeing your baby for the first time on the ultrasound. Oh, and eventually, your boobs do stop feeling like 2 painful growths that are about to explode.
what is with this ask ari crap
Hang in there! 1st trimester is the hardest, for a lot of people.
... wait, people are telling you to treasure the *pregnancy*? That's weird. It's irritating enough when they tell you to treasure the squalling at 3 AM. As if you couldn't be trusted to work out what's to treasure and what's not :->
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